I find it amazing how many relationships fall apart because of something quite simple that is missing: communication. I watch many women going into great detail about their relationship problems with their friends, so that their friends have a much clearer idea of what the problem is than their partner. What is the purpose of that? How are we ever supposed to remedy any situation if our partners either a) don’t know what the problem is or b) don’t even know that there is a problem. I have made this mistake many times in my past and current relationship(s), but the good news is that I am finally learning. Every time I feel that I have been treated badly, I remember something essential: it is never my partner’s intention to hurt me. Therefore I need to stop feeling hurt, angry, affronted, etc, when I don’t need to be.
Most of my partner’s behaviour that may cause me upset, it actually a result of a misunderstanding or a miscommunication.
You can see now that simple communication can fix these hurt feelings. There is often no way to prevent the situations from happening, but the anger and upset can be avoided if we just remember that our partner was not intending to hurt us. This immediately makes us look for a more reasonable and probably more likelyexplanation.
The next challenge of course is for us to stop enjoying the drama of hurt feelings. Spend that energy elsewhere.
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